Sunday, February 24, 2013

Week One: Updating on P3

Well, I think I made it through week 1 of P3 successfully. They give you 2 pounds on either end of your ending weight to flux in, and I think I've hit all of them. Since I weighed in so early today (oh, Sunday, I think I'm going to start banning the scale on you), I'm not really sure if I should be doing a correction day or not. I was as good as I think I could have been yesterday, but maybe over-indulged in some spinach dip (with a fork, not chips) last night at dinner. Plus eating later than normal. Plus not getting nearly enough water in. It made for a bad combo. Instead of freaking out, I'm going to eat really clean today and hope for the best tomorrow on the scale, even though we are eating out with friends for lunch.

This phase has been difficult and tricky. It's not the emotional excitement of losing weight every day; instead it's the fear of jumping on the scale and it suddenly having something very different than what you thought it was going to say going on. It's about learning what my body can have and not have (and when to say no to cheese. I've been eating a lot of cheese. the day after I eat cheese my body seems to go up). While I haven't had to do a realy correction day yet, depending on the scale it may be tomorrow.

I have 11 days before my mom comes to town. I would love to stabilize about 2 pounds under where I am right now before that happens. So, off to drink some more water and not snack this morning. Or this afternoon. Or ever again. Weekends are definitely the hardest part of this whole thing!!

Thursday, February 21, 2013

Learning My New Normal

The first few days of this phase have been hard. It's been and up and down game on the scale, and it's been frustrating and difficult in a lot of ways. I've shed a few tears and had a few freak out moments. What I've discovered is that this is a lifestyle change. For a minute I think I had forgotten that. I thought I lost 26 lbs and I would at least have that while I worked on losing more. Not so, though. I still have to be careful. I still have to learn HOW to eat right and make smart choices. I have to learn that not everything will work with my body and not to eat EVERYTHING at once. It's been a struggle. I quickly gained a pound and a half. Talked to my friend Pam yesterday and realized maybe, for the first time ever, I wasn't eating enough fat in my diet. Really tried to add more for dinner last night. Was down a 1.2 this morning and just a little over the baseline I'm supposed to use for this phase. They give you 2 pounds either way of your last weigh in. 2 pounds under is exciting. 2 pounds over kind of makes me want to puke :)

So, here's to learning. Hopefully stabilizing quickly so I don't have to worry too much about what I'm putting in my body. with every bite. And hopefully next time someone has Pizza X bread sticks, I can eat one, because those are YUMMY!

Monday, February 18, 2013

Real Food is Yum

Yesterday was a scary day for me in a lot of ways. I went out to eat. It was awesome. I incorporated more food back into my diet. It was awesome. I was terrified I would be up 3 lbs on the scale this morning. Mentally I expected that. I had stuffed mushrooms. I had Parmesan chicken. I had salad with cheese. I had sweet potato tots. I had a lot of food. Over 1200 calories.

I also did my Jillian Michaels DVD for the first time in probably a year. I would say I made it through 93% of it. Why do these things always start with push ups? I am such a weakling.

Anyway, I stepped on the scale this morning. And was down. .2 but I was down. I broke through another barrier. I got my t-shirt I've been wanting. I hit my second goal. On phase 3. I know there will still be a lot of ups and downs on this process, but I am a happy girl this morning.

I also made some great egg/ham/cheese muffins for breakfast this week. I did the math and they are 65 calories each. A serving is 2. So for breakfast I had two of those and 6 ounces of pure cranberry juice. I am a happy Emily today.

Here is the recipe:
6 eggs
2 egg whites
1/4 cup milk
1/2 cup diced ham
1/2 cup shredded cheddar
salt & pepper to taste.

Blend eggs and milk and set aside. Spray a 12 count muffin tin with pam or oil to keep eggs from sticking (this only 1/2 worked for me). Add ham and cheese in even amounts to the bottom of each muffin. Cover with egg mixture until 2/3 full.

Bake at 350 for 15-20 minutes or until a toothpick in the middle of each comes out clean. Let sit in the muffin tin for 5 minutes. Remove and enjoy!

Next time I will add more veggies and maybe some hot sauce to the top. I have breakfasts now for the next 6 days! YAY!

Sunday, February 17, 2013

Days 40 & 41: Wrapping up P2

Well, here we are. The end of P2. Today was actually my first day of P3. I ate some yummy food for lunch, and am drinking lots of water now. It seems strange to think that I am here, trying to get my brain around maintaining my weight instead of continuing to lose. I would like to lose another 25 pounds, so it's a strange place to be. I know this is an important part of my journey, but it's going to be hard. I'd like to say the next few weeks are going to be a lot of fun. But, I think they're going to be a lot more difficult than even the first 40 days were. It's going to take a lot more mental energy to stay focused and interested in this part of the program. With only a few things I'm not supposed to eat, they are the things I really want to eat: namely sweets and breads/carbs. But, I don't want to shoot myself in the foot and not be able to stabilize.

This morning was exciting, though. It was the first day people at church really noticed that I had been losing weight. It might have just been because of the outfit, but whatever it was, I will take it.

So, without further ado, here are the stats from my first round of this program.

Pounds Lost: 25.8
Inches off Waist: 7.5
Inches of Bust: 7
Inches of Arm: 1.5
Inches of Leg: 3.3
Total Inches Lost: 18.3 

All in all, I will take it, even though I was a pound short of my goal for this round. (So close, but so far).

Friday, February 15, 2013

Day 39: The Emotional Side

I will admit I was a little freaked out when I woke up this morning to small gain, given that it was my first dropless day. It scared me, but then I realized I didn't eat dinner until almost 9 and I'm not convinced the tomato paste I used was 100% on program. And I tried miracle noodles for the first time last night (they were good, but maybe not the smartest idea this close to the end of P2).

So today is all about water and being on program. Fighting through the hunger. I would really like to get that last pound off and I have two more weigh ins to do it (I'm counting my Sunday AM weigh in since I will have been on program all day Saturday).

The next phase is going to be an emotional roller-coaster for me. I know they give you a 2 pound window to flux in, but I just don't want to. I want to continue to lose. I want to get down another 15-20 lbs. Realistically, my goal is another 10 before my birthday at the end of April.  I'm not sure how that will work with the diet, but I'm sure going to try. Continuing to eat healthy and working out will be key.

Healthy 2013 is off to a great start, but I still have so far to go!

Thursday, February 14, 2013

Day 38: In transition

Today-Saturday is the transition from P2 to P3 of this diet. It's been a crazy, crazy ride. I remember starting and thinking there is no way I could really do it. It was too hard. Too regimented. Too limited. I was skeptical. I was afraid. I was an emotional mess.

Now, on day 38, I'm a different person. I realized somewhere along the line that I am doing this not because I want to be skinny, not because I have to hit some arbitrary ideal weight that I thought I had to reach to be a success in life and to feel beautiful. I am doing this because I was just flat out tired of who I was. I wanted to be different. I wanted to feel different about my body. I wanted to be confident. I wanted to feel beautiful. I wanted to reflect my inner beauty on the outside.

In the last month, I've realized I want to choose to be different. I want to be healthier. I don't want to go back to the way I used to eat all the time. I want to enjoy a piece of chocolate and some pizza every now and then. But, I want to feel healthy and strong more than that. I want to keep these first 25 lbs off. I'd like to lose more. I'd like to lose another 15-20, realistically (I know that doesn't reflect the goals on the side of my blog, but I'm starting to wonder if I've been so obsessed with being a number on the scale that I've forgotten some other things).

I am looking forward to learning how to eat with more options in my diet. I'm sure it will be a trial and error kind of experience. I'm sure I will have days where I completely blow it and days where I completely succeed. I'm learning to be okay with that.

This year, I drew a line in the sand. I said I either have to be okay with my body the way it is or I have to change it. I chose change. And it's been hard. But it's been so worth it.

Wednesday, February 13, 2013

Day 37: Skinny jeans and all

I was really hoping for another pound of weight loss today, but only had .4. I'm trying to resign myself to the fact that I won't hit my next goal before this round is over, but I'm not quite giving up yet.

In very happy news, I am wearing "skinny jeans" for the first time in my adult life. This may not seem like a big deal to most people. But, to someone who readily wears baggy, hide my body clothes at every and any opportunity, the concept of skinny jeans was always ridiculous. I wouldn't want to show off my body like that. I wouldn't want to show off my curves. I wouldn't want people to see me.

But, I needed more jeans. So, I went shopping last week and bought a pair of skinny jeans - on purpose. And, I'm so thankful for Liz, who I texted at an obscenely early hour in Chicago this morning just for her assurance that I really could pull them off. I will admit, I'm feeling a little sassy in them. Oh, and now I want boots!

Tuesday, February 12, 2013

Day 36

Woo-hoo! A 1.4 lb lost this late in the game is definitely something to celebrate. I'm just 2.6 from where I wanted to end this round, with until Saturday to do it. I feel like that's something I can accomplish if i drink lots of water and stick to the approved list pretty closely!


I've been looking at recipes for what I'm going to start eating next week. Strangely, I'm most excited about salads - big salads with lots of different veggies.

I'm telling you, these Walden Farms dressings have CHANGED my life.

After this initial 40 days, I will continue blogging on this site, but I will not be writing every day. I want to keep checking in and being held accountable, though!

Monday, February 11, 2013

Day 34 & 35

As I suspected, I didn't lose anything Sunday morning. I'm convinced it had something to do with weighing in earlier than normal.

Now, it's Monday. The last Monday of this phase of the diet. As much as I have been looking forward to this week, I am a little terrified. I'm still just a few pounds away from where I would like to be for this phase. I really want to reach my goal. At the same time, I'm finding myself more and more tempted by other foods and wanting to eat more variety!

My prayer is that I take reintroducing new foods into my diet slowly and don't gain back the weight. I've worked so hard the last 35 days!

Saturday, February 9, 2013

Day 33: Almost done blogging every day

...and that's probably a good thing. Because I am OUT of things to say.

So, i lost a bit today. It would be disappointing, but i look at the whole picture and i've lost 2.4 pounds in basically 2 days. Focusing on the positive.

In other news, I ate some nasty Tuna mixture for lunch today. Or tried to. It was gross. No lunch for me.

Friday, February 8, 2013

Day 32: Counting Down instead of Up!

Just a few more days to go. I'm going into my last full weekend of this phase and I'm excited about that. At the same time, adding calories and integrating more food into my diet is looming and I'm so nervous about that!!
I managed to be down another pound this morning. YAY! Right now, though I'm struggling to get all my water in and just don't want to drink any more of it. So, hopefully I can power through and tomorrow will be okay, too. Just a few more days, just a few more pounds. I read a lot last night of how people doing this move on the P3. Some have great luck, some have horrible luck and bounce around a lot. I'm really hoping I'm one of those great luck people!!

Thursday, February 7, 2013

Day 31: Six pounds. Nine days. Let's do this.

High protein day yesterday was a success! Now, if only I had done that on Monday :) Still not the huge weight loss that I wanted, but I think I broke through my set weight. I hope so, anyway. Tomorrow will be the big long as the scale keeps moving DOWN, I'm good. Back on program today. I'm not hungry at all anymore, so I actually have to remind myself to eat :) Which is a strange, but very good, thing.

I would really REALLY REALLY like to lose 6 more pounds before this phase ends. That means I have to lose about a half a pound a day through the end of this phase. That sounds like a lot, but it's totally doable. I woke up this morning determined to get that blasted T-shirt that has sat, wrapped, on top of my dresser for 18 months. I WILL be wearing it in 9 days. I believe in myself. It helps that I have some awesome readers who also believe in me :)

I made some tomato soup the other night. It was super tasty, AND diet friendly:

2 Cups vegetable broth I used organic stock because it had less calories
2 Cups fresh to tomatoes, diced and seeded
2 T garlic, minced
2 t garlic powder
5-6 basil leaves
oregano, marjoram, salt and pepper to taste

Blend everything together until smooth. Put in soup pot and bring to a boil. Reduce heat and let simmer for 20 minutes. Garnish with fresh basil. Makes two 1 cup servings. Counts as a vegetable serving.

It was warm and yummy. I made Tim tomato soup out of a can that night. I think I liked mine better :)

Wednesday, February 6, 2013

Day 30

No loss.
I'm stuck.
And sad about it.

Just a few more days on this phase.
I have a goal I'd like to hit before it's over.
But that's still 7 lbs away.
Trying to stay positive.

That's it.

Tuesday, February 5, 2013

Day 29: The Final Countdown

First of all, my apple day didn't work nearly as well as I hoped, so I had my first actual cry about this process this morning. I hate that I let my willpower go on Sunday night. I hate that I didn't just say no to the yummy foods in front of me. I'd be happier the last two days if I had done that.

But, I still have 12 days to go and I'm not ready to give up yet. I want to hit my second goal on this round so that I feel like I've made some good steps forward. I want to be at a certain weight before I transition into stage 3. It's going to be hard, but I can do it. If I lose another 7-8 lbs, I will be a happy girl.

Then, it's mentally getting ready for not losing this fast any more. I've loved the kick start. And thinking that it will take me another 6 months to get where I ultimately want to be makes me angry - at myself, at diets, at slow weight loss. But, I really want to get there. As helpful as this has been, I don't think I can do another round of this. I'm still not sure it's good for my body in the long run, quite frankly.

I'm 100% on program today. Hopefully tomorrow will show a huge loss on the scale. Or at least enough that I don't feel like this isn't worth it any more and am tempted to give up, like I was this morning!

Monday, February 4, 2013

Day 28: Whoops

I definitely enjoyed myself at my Super Bowl party more than I should. Oh well. Up a little over a pound today. Doing an apple day today and hoping to get back on track. I kind of want to cry, but I knew what I was doing and know I need to take responsibility for that.

Today is a new day.

Sunday, February 3, 2013

Day 26 & 27

Spent night & Saturday out of town. Tried a new scale - it was way different than mine. I weighed in when I got back home this morning and had lost .6 since Friday morning. Given I was out of my element, ate some yummy Chipotle, and was way off my schedule, I'll take it. That's about .3 a day, so yay!

Tonight I just have to survive the Super Bowl party and be back on schedule. 13 more days of this phase. I'm tired of it, but really would like to lose another 9.4 lbs in the next 13 days!

Friday, February 1, 2013

Day 25! Another Milestone

20 lbs. I've effectively lost a toddler off my body in the last month. That's INSANE.

I'm excited to see what the next 15 days hold. As much as I'm ready to be done with this, I'm also hoping to lost at least 10 more pounds over the next 15 days. As slow as this week has gone, I know that will be a struggle, but I'm hopeful. 30 lbs would be huge. I think I could almost fit in the dress I want to wear for Easter at 30 lbs.

I'm excited and a little nervous about this weekend. The possibility of snow means I'm heading to Cincy tonight see Liz. So, instead of just one or two meals to figure out while gone, I'm up to a full day/day and a half. I've packed some stuff up, though, and I know Liz is also losing weight, so hopefully we can keep each other healthy. I am planning on enjoying some Chipotle either tonight or tomorrow night, though. And I'm okay with that. It's relatively healthy, and I need to learn to live with this weight loss, not hide from life because of it!

So, it's going to be a good weekend. I can tell already!

I probably won't be able to blog as much, but I'll try and stick something up. I also don't know how similar Liz and I's scales are, so that could be interesting...

Love you all!

PS: Here is me, 20 lbs lighter. I did a mud run back last April. I was too heavy to wear this shirt. This is the first time I've been able to wear it. Still a long way to go, but this feels good!

(and this is also the first mirror/camera shot I've ever taken)

Things that Weigh 20 Pounds

I did it! 20 pounds gone. Think that's not a lot? Here are some things that weight 20 pounds:

A Propane Tank

A Car Tire

A Kitchenaid Mixer

This Crazy Tuna

I absolutely hate lugging around that kitchenaid mixer, especially. I can't believe I've been carrying that around on my body.